Good Evening, I added a video after my prayer, it goes along on how I feel. I am able to look up a little more each day to God. Today was good. I got great news today that my work insurance granted Alex and I to have coverage without having to wait til October for enrollment. It is cheaper than Anthem and also has dental, prescription and life insurance included. Tonight Alex and I had Erin's House (place for grieving families) and I decided to give my group a second chance. It went better than a month ago. It really helped. There was another lady there that her husband killed himself in the back yard and it is hard for her to live in the house. I am so thankful that Chris didn't do it here so I am able to still admire his creation. She also was a stay at home mom. She wasn't wanting to tell more so I don't know if he had a disease or what. When I told my story and how God has really shown Himself to me through providing for things and strength, she did open up and share that the high school where her kids attend (same private school Chris went) that they said the tuition will be covered for the next 4 years and she knows that is God. I am praying that God will show me if this is who I need to be a witness to. It seems almost everyone in my group is Catholic. But as my pastors and I say, at the end of the day we all serve the same God. Tonight as I am typing I am making brownies for Alex to take to school for her carnival tomorrow night. I am still worrying with my friends that work at the local GM plant if they or their spouses will have a job still, so please keep them in your prayers.

Last night and this morning I couldn't find a note that Chris wrote and left in my work pocket that I had taped to one of our pictures together that said "you are the light in my heart". I did find it tonight it had fallen off and stuck to the side of a white box and when I moved the box it fell. So I am feeling better tonight. In my group tonight I said the hardest thing about not having someone you love anymore is not having the love anymore. I didn't realize how much Chris helped me through the day. I get so aggitated and frustrated more easily at work and it bothers me because I am a loving, kind, patient person at work, atleast I was when he was alive. We would text one another on breaks to help eachother get through even if it was just a hi, or a I love you. I also said I get mad at Chris when I need him to fix or do something and he is not here but then feel guilty for being mad at him. Another lady identified with me on that and it was just recently it happened to her (after 5 yrs of losing her husband) when her daughter's car wasn't working right and also college information (she always thought her husband would sit in the mtgs).

My prayer tonight is that God will continue to work in our lives and that we will continue to trust and lean on Him. Have our faith grow stronger. I pray for the people who need or are at risk of losing their jobs that God will give them the peace they need and provide for them. I continue to pray for the loved ones who need healing from sickness, despair, or depression. I pray for the people who are looking for a partner to share their lives with and to have a family. I thank God for all that He is doing in the lives of His sons and daughters and what He is going to do. As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.